August 2000 - Sinister - missprint.org

Sinister: The virgin Joseph
by Joe.Ballard＠arcadiagroup.co.uk 09 Aug '00

09 Aug '00

Hello fellow belle-ends! Don't look now, but I'm NEW and I'm NAKED....... I don't know quite how I got here but I like it and I really don't want to go home just yet. Here is my story I fell in love two months ago. It was on a bus and it was with B&S. And it was my pal Lorraine wot dunnit. Me and Lorraine used to sit together at work and tug each other's hair, laugh at each other's trousers and pull rude stunts with sausage sarnies from the staff caff. Crazy days. I thought she looked like Jarvis Cocker with breasts and I wasn't afraid to tell her so. She smirked and said I looked like Morrissey with a mysterious wasting disease. I said "fine" ... The days passed in a slow blur. The hours came and went every sixty minutes. The public transport system sent us round and round in circles. Then one sticky Tuesday afternoon in Joon Lorraine threw a tape at me. "Prick up your ears boy. It's about time YOU got with the NOW" she declared before skipping off to do some more photocopying. The tape in question (IYFS and TBWTAS) fell into the bottom of my knapsack and set about collecting grains of tobacco and broken biscuits. Not a spool moved until the following Saturday... Friday night fizzed and bubbled and eventually went flat and tasteless, just like the premium lager I was drinking in foolish amounts. My brain took a right old pounding. Victoria Coach Station early the next morning was like a wet Wednesday in hell with early closing and dogshit on the pavements and everything. Crawling like a broken stick insect onto a dismal National Express coach I felt horribly feeble, nay WOEful, and was barely able to untangle my walkman, insert the cassette and press play before folding myself into a sickening contortionist slumber. But byJimminy was it worth the effort... ***THE HAPPY ENDING*** ... I awoke near Beaconsfield with a start, and found myself in the middle of a pop-up revelation (you know the sort of thing: I was dreaming, I was sleeping, I was stuck to my seat). "GET ME AWAY FROM HERE I'M DYING" sang my headphones and I couldn't have agreed more even if I tried. Except I could, cos I was no longer dying, I was... well ... alive!!!! Hello trees, hello sky, hello clouds. Hello B&S. In the ensuing minutes I tangled with the Major, ran myself ragged in terry-towel underwear, mused on my top ten wanks, shed tears of delight at the woo-woo noises on sleep the clock around and generally did my nut over the belle and the boy sebastian. And then did it again. And again. And again. You could have seen my grin from Mars... And the rest is double history followed by CDT. All I can say is thank you forever Lorraine - I didn't mean it about Jarvis. And hello belle fiends. Can I stay? luv Joe +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: You Spin Me Right Round
by DelyM2＠aol.com 09 Aug '00

09 Aug '00

Lately I've been splurging a bit too much with my money. For instance , today I bought Fold YOur hands , on vinyl. and i already have the CD. god. what on earth was i thinking. i dont even own a record player. i must be turning into a nerd or something. sorry. +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: the stars are beautiful because of a flower that cannot be seen
by Bipedalboy＠aol.com 09 Aug '00

09 Aug '00

this is my first post :) there shall be more to come.... +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: gulls, smelts, and their ilk
by Ted Whalen 09 Aug '00

09 Aug '00

This is the SECOND EVER POST BY ME The post /after/ the "Hi, I'm a mopey boy with touseled hair who rides public transportation." post. This is the one where I have ON TOPIC INFORMATION A new, insightful album review of the much-beloved/much-maligned FISHYCLAP is at <http://www.furia.com/twas/0288.html>. This useful (to someone, I imagine) tibit is followed by the SHAMELESS MENTION OF LISTCRUSH You should all be voting (not necessarily for me) and not sitting on your hands. Only 4 votes this month (and none of them for me) is sad. Really. <http://www.missprint.org/sinister/crush.html> Not that I'm mentioning this to get your vote. Really. It is summer, and in my hemisphere, it is hot. Everyone should have a crush for the summer. That is how it works. Those of you on the bottom of the globe, you have an excuse. Remember, you don't have to vote for me, you can vote for OTHER PEOPLE Including those on this list who I have met and for whose crushworthy-ness I can vouch. I will now shout out to them in alphabetical order. allie! brandt! ted! Thank you for your attention. tew -- 'Trains leave at minutes shown past each hour' Ted Whalen - tew(a)introvert.net <http://introvert.net> +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: sheep in bowlie clothing and the best of both worlds
by carle groome 09 Aug '00

09 Aug '00

dear sister-nines, i know how often our blighty bretheren (and sisteren--not "cistern" which could be misinterpreted as either a "well" or, at a far remove, "reservior") have talked about chance sightings of stray badges and outer-underwear to make contact with others of our ilk (hmmm, not exactly happy with "ilk", but we'll let it go this time) but in nyc, at least for those of us beyond the precincts of major universities (i.e.: nyu, columbia, sarah lawrence, etc.) it isn't too common. so imagine my surprise at finding myself staring at the fabled "study at stowe" in faded cerulean blue! i was meeting my gay pal sam to go off to a birthday party on the hudson that a sculptor friend of his was throwing (BTB, smashing picture postcard sunset, that) for herself. and it seems the bright lass in the b&s tee was staying at my his apartment while he was out of town (on a recommedation from his niece at yale, where both fems attended). my first reaction was, of course, "are you sinister?" and, of course, she wondered what the deuce i was talking about. after my explanation, hers was that she'd "borrowed" it from her suitemate (interesting about that word; homophonically, the same as "sweetmate," implying something altogether different in relationships) and was hoping she'd never remember to ask for it back. however, as we were late for the river and the gal was already wheeling her mountain bike towards the door and so there's little else to say about her tastes. nice shirt though. lesson? beware of sheep (aka: the "eli" or "yalie" is nicknamed after their school song "we're poor little lambs who have lost our way"--honest! i'm not making this up!) in bowlie clothing! yes. well, stretching points is much more fun than sticking on them. part two. in re: the above confusion of there/here. noting a thread on the strangeness of the isles speech and the richness of the slang therein, it should be mentioned that there's no reason why we should pretend towards, nay!--or even champion, exclusiveness in our word choice. winston churchill said it best: "america and england are one people separated by a common language." over here, we've been absorbing your lingo since shakespeare, with a healthy dose of dickens and by the time of "the british invasion" of the '60s, we were more than ready to take on more. and perhaps that's why even abba had to sing in anglomerican (or "midlantic" if you prefer... first heard that one in "absolute beginners." was that just concocted for the film or is it real?) in order to make it huge. fact is, the world of pop is ours specifically from that consequence. try as they might, no other country can really make anything that resonates with the immediacy to affect teens, toffs, toughs, 'tweeners and turf-surfers en masse. it is the bastard child of a thousand fathers that takes a little from french, german, spanish, italian, scandanavian--whatever comes along. several years back, i was doing a review of the love box set (no, not house of love--the west coast psychedelic era band fronted by arthur lee) and it occured to me how incredibly varied this material was. and then i thought about the context that it came out of: top 40 AM radio. that was the time you could have the rolling stones "satisfaction" and the kinks "lola" on the same list as frank sinatra, peggy lee, "the man of la mancha" broadway cast album, dave brubeck's "take five" jazz, wilson pickett, novelty hits like a jugband number called "the eggplant that ate chicago" or "winchester cathedral" as it harked back to rudy vallee... i mean, a complete hodgepodge, true, but one that could never be called dull, or offer sameness in the manner of today's programmed MOR. so old arthur lee could have honky tonk next to a movie soundtrack cover next to big swing next to interpersonal ballads next to all-out freak-outs, and THAT would be consistency, not conformity. that's why b&s can stand alongside giants like brian wilson as he exchanges bows with the beatles and burt bacharach can join with elvis costello and all can look back to where tin pan alley, folk city and the brill building shared space with the venerable music hall and street buskers. therefore, if we pepper our palates with "suss" (re: Who) or "fag" (countless cigarette refs in movies) or "loo" (cf. previous) there should be no need for any sanction. (actually recall a book called "the loo sanction"...nevermind) so, the best of both worlds. and best to all concerned carle +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: avert your eyes children, he may take on other forms
by Lawrence Mikkelsen 09 Aug '00

09 Aug '00

**LUNATIC DRIVERS** I hate people that drive big 4WD land rovers around the suburbs. I know in America they're pretty common, so I don't want to offend any truck-driving American listees with the following rant. It's just that in New Zealand, the sort of people who drive these menaces are almost invariably middled aged, wealthy suburban housewives who drive like lunatics and think they own the whole bloody road. I pulled out of my driveway this afternoon and saw one up the road, a few hundred metres away. Anyway, this psycho sppeds up, starts flashing her lights and attempts to overtake me on the very narrow road we live on, just because I was driving AT the speed limit, rather than 30 km/h over it. Anyway, me being the contary bastard that I am, speed up, swerved into the middle of the road so that she wouldn't be able to overtake me, started honking my horn and giving her "the fingers" with great ghusto. She overtook me anywaym at about 100 km/h, on the wrong side of the road. Great start to the day. **MR STEVEN WELLS** Read his review for "Little Kix", the new Mansun album today. I'm probably alone on this list for liking Mansun, but I think they are a brilliantly inventive band. Anyway, his review was rather scathing, and much like his "interview" with Struan, seemed to entirely miss the point. And again I say, this man has, in the past, defended The Bluetones. Not that I have anything agaist The Bluetones. But Swells was saying that Mansun weren't doing anything new. And I don't recall The Bluetones ever really going out on an avant garde limb. **SHOCK/HORROR** The new B&S album has been released locally here, and is apparently selling quite well, mostly to men in their late 30s, apparently. And in most places you get the single of "Legal Man" free with the album. Boy ... sure makes me feel like a tool for mistakenly buying it twice, once for $20.00 and once for $29.00. (sigh) Oh well ... I'm still convinced I was the first person in New Zealand to hear the album. That must count for something, right? I ate six crumpets for lunch today. I'm home sick with a migrane. Eating crumpets is just expected of you, when you're sick. **B&S DREAMS** Haven't had one in ages. I dreamt last night, however, that some guy invented a time machine just so he could go back to the early 80s, buy up heaps of mint-in-box Star Wars action figures and then make gigantic amounts of money. The dream then degenerated into me battling Darth Vader in a toyshop somewhere. It was prety intense. But not as intense the night before when I dreamt about this snake wrapping tiself around my leg and not letting go. I'm sure Doctor Freud would have something to say about that one. Avert your eyes children ... I am about tu supplicate myself ..... **RADIO SESSIONS** My plea last week for the Radio 1 Evening Session in exchange for the two Radcliffe Sessions heralded only one reply. (Cheers Jessica! - your tape's in the mail) Anyway, I am STILL desperate for those sessions in either super-crisp FM stereo or on a CD of some kind. (Along with the "bus session" of 'The Wrong Girl' it at all possible.) Someone MUST have them, surely? Anyway, maybe my offer wasn't that appealing, so just let me say I have more Go-Betweens rarities than you can shake a (very big) stick at, as well as the Nick Drake "Tamworth in Arden" bootleg, should anyone anything like that burned onto a CD-R as a trade. C'mon kids ... how about it. I'm down on my knees here. Similarly, if anyone has the "complete" Black Sessions (mine is on a tape, and is missing "Paper Boat", I'd love to get a CD vrsion of that too. Pleading over. **ANNOYING PERSONAL BIT** Chris McQuain, you're going to have to send me your address in order for me to send that Auteurs tape. Well, take care kids ... Lawrence Mikkelsen http://www.akn.quik.co.nz/mikelsen/aboutme +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: They echo Tolstoy in their assertion that history is "an inexorable march, with persona irrelevant," although their own looming presence threatens to block out the sun
by Steven Kado 09 Aug '00

09 Aug '00

hey you (and you, and you and you and you and you etc.) the universe! no. (ha ha ha)* its warmish and i'm wearing black undies and red socks and wandering about the house drinking soy milk from the carton. Maybe i'll wear pants (or trousers) and go get a roti! R O T I ! so ! stuart murdoch wants to auction off his talents. perhaps we can get a big pond of money or agree to collude on the auctioning to make sure that no list-member drives up the bid prices against another list member. Then, once we've secured the 'services' (wink) of every member of the band we can then make them show us their 'skills' at the same place at the same time and we can coinicidentally leave several musical instruments around...it may be the only way of making any b&s concert 'action' happen this year. for my talent i will take pictures of gross people holding signs that have the letters of your name on them, so that if your name is 'phil' there will be 4 pictures of four different unplesant characters holding signs. this is a good value for people with very long names. or i'll find interesting things in the street and give them to you for a month. I FOUND PORNOGRAPHY! a VHS cassette full of it! on the road! with scavenging skills like that you know that the neat things i find are worth a fortune! the funny thing is that the porno appeared right after i said 'videocassette' in conversation. and there's this scene where this man in a ski mask with aviator glasses on wearing crotchless pants (underwear? do i have this right?) with a big paunch jerks off into the thin end of a pylon. under the visor that protects the tape i found a fortune cookie fortune that told me i would get all that i desired through wit and charm, onthe other side was written 'convicsion'. weird. if you fancy pylons i'll make a copy for you. months earlier i also once found a metal box full of fortune cookies. so...it seems like the entire UK contingent of the list has had an agressive attack of the Magnetic Fields. and that is all well and good, i think the Mag Fields are great. but from the tone of many of the posts people seem to _just_ be discovering the Magnetic Fields and they're doing this by buying 69 lerv songs....which isn't what you should do! as good as 69 is, it is their most thin and underwritten album. you are all barking up the wrong tree or l'arbre incorrect (if you're that way inclined)...go buy get lost and then once you're completely unable to live without stephin merritt in yr life you can go get the massive albatros album and gothic archies records and future bible heroes (new ep out!) and such. ok? also, last night i went over to a friend's house and rented loneliness of a long distance runner. which was tremendous! are all tony richardson's films that good? i'd rent more. the way that long unsupervised running scene binds the entire flash-back together is incredible...and sometimes that guy looks just like mark e smith. sometimes.... not always... the other thing is that this friend has 7 other housemates (its a large house) and one of them is a big metal head. i'm not talking about metallica or slipknot or any of that lame shit but stuff like dillinger escape plan and such...he's really really hardcore. and that's great, because other than being the last martha and the muffins fan in the world and quoting nation of ulysses in all of my posts i also really really really love napalm death. so we get along great. so mr. metal head comes downstairs and asks what movie we're watching and then he tells me that iron maiden have a song by that name too. so at last! the link between maiden and b&s has been established! now the truth is revealed. this is leading me to an entire re-evaluation of b&s's oevre in terms of the connection to terrible 80's mainstream metal, maybe now family tree will make some sense, just maybe. maybe next time they do a live show (in maybe 5 years) they can get bruce dickenson to do the monica queen parts in llpj. that'd be pretty um, great. yes. bye s t e v en *a clever joke. +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: it was a fine idea at the time
by brad ! 08 Aug '00

08 Aug '00

hi ho. i'd like to toss my hat in the proverbial ring of auctioning off one's talents for charity. i will come 'round to anyone's house, uk or us, and give them a right good sock in the nose. bidding starts at five bucks american. for slightly more, we could engage in some strenuous intercourse. male or female. although, if you're male and you decide you would like to rock me from the backside, so to speak, you must first supply me with enough liquor to effectively black out the memory and/or sensation. and as far as the charity goes...well, i won't lie. i'll keep the money and do with it as i see fit. ah hell, i'll drop a penny or two in that little thing at burger king with bubbles floating up and you gotta make them land on the rotating pedestals. i ain't greedy or nothing. now it's a brilliant mistake. -brad ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: a dream of a sinisterine....was it you?
by amy_jackson0 08 Aug '00

08 Aug '00

please help. this is going to sound strange. but i had a dream. about a sinisterine. called Mark Casarotto (or however you spell your name.) this is odd, cos i've never even met the guy. so sorry, i can't help what my subconcious comes up with in my sleep. anyway, Mr Mark lived in a big old wooden house, with lots of spiral staircases and rugs on the floor. red rugs they were, very fluffy. anyway, everyone in the town where we lived was scared of Mr Mark cos he lived in the big house. and i was dared by the hard kids to go and knock on his door and then run away. so, one night (in my dream) i went to his house and knocked on the big door. and he didn't answer. so i knocked again. and then the door opened and i heard music, by some glaswegian band that we all quite like. so i went into the hall and started dancing about, singing along to "le pastie de la posh people", and then Mr Mark was stood at the top of the stairs laughing at me. (but he was dancing too) so i ran away, and it was really stormy and "le pastie.." was still being played really loud. then i woke up. so mr mark, i'm sorry about all that. and in my dream you were tall and had black floppy hair and you wore a black shirt and flares. just thought you'd like to know. exam results will follow soon..... amy xx ****************************************** "keep it away! it's freaking me out!" Tom, Gimme Gimme Gimme ****************************************** +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Revert to type in times of fear
by Alasdair Cook MC1996 08 Aug '00

08 Aug '00

I shall respond to some points today, since I have nothing better to do with my time and since my name seems to have been dropped on occasions over the past week, almost to the point where it is displaying evidence of minor bruising. I expect no sympathy. It is, after all, only a name. On to business, firstly Mr Pinefox (one has to ask, does the 'glove' feel lonely to have been left out? This is probably a rhetorical question. Probably) who said: > If only Tim Popkins were here, it might be in order to muster some great > jokes along the lines of, > > Just Live Devon > Stairway To Devon > Devon In A Wild Flower Or even, if I were trying to really antagonise the old man, I might propose 'Near Wild Devon'. Although he might (with any luck) have no idea what I was talking about and I would be excused a beating. And having never been to fairest Sidmouth I cannot say that 'wild' could not be further from the truth. I have absolutely no idea. Enlighten me. When staring out to sea, what does one see? Africa or South America? > I appreciate his solicitude for the > treasures of the text; but I think he's mistaken, cos I said: > > >>This list has fair exploded into a forest fire of action in the last week > >>or so > > which does not involve any explicit allusion to similitude. Point well made, and taken in my usual good humour. Obviously I was too caught up in the blaze to study the text closely enough. Or perhaps I was just looking for a cheap laugh. It wouldn't be the first time, as many of you know. After a brief intermission, he continues: > I think 96 had > been attending too many shows in Camden and getting amazing vibes about pop > about pop. When I say too many shows, I mean the opposite: he'd been, he'd > seen - and he'd got the picture. I think - I'd like to think - he's bang on. > He bangs on, too, sometimes. Or does he? Unfortunately no, I did not get the picture. Not on film anyway. But in my mind the exposure is fresh, and still excites me, in a strange way which possibly even I don't understand. I could have sworn that guitar was re-strung... I particularly like the way Mr Pinefox says 'about pop' twice. The second time it should be shouted. ABOUT POP! I do bang on. In an altogether unhealthy way. On to LunaLilly, who dribbled: > he looked like SM so much. But I know why in the > hell would he be in Omaha. So it wasn't him. But how I wish it was and he > would have slid up to my table and said "my I really like your powerpuff girl > watch....and you are so lovely ...you would look so good in my car." Which unfortunately conjured up disturbing images of Stuart M stuffing Lilly into the boot of his car, laughing all the while at some half-remembered joke, proffessing to be doing 'God's bidding' as his church crumbles down around him. But then that's complete nonsense, of course. Hey, I've just read Stuart's thing about the manpower auction. Sounds fantastic! What a top bloke. Pity I have no obvious talents to offer, and little money with which to bid. Although the money is for charity, so I may be cajoled. I often am. Then Ian piped up: > Someone mentioned breasts, so I thought I'd contribute an Alistair Cook > style poem: > > I'm most impressed, > With your pendulous breasts, > But may I suggest, > It's time you got dressed. > > Mmmmm....not bad.... Not bad indeed young sir, it has even inspired me: I feel such lust For your sumptuous bust That your patent disgust Is simply unjust I'm not doing drugs But I've been round at Doug's And he said that your jugs Are better than Suggs' I'd better stop now, or I'll be hit. Actually, I think I've already passed that point. I will suffer injuries, most probably. The curiously named 'DelyM2' then asked: > PS: Is there some kind of rotting tree in Glasgow that is a must see?? None that I can think of, although there may well be. There is one in Greenwich Park, but that's in London, which isn't Glasgow (despite my attempts to will it otherwise, on certain occassions). No, far more likely that you are thinking of the famous garotting flea. The garotting flea killed two people in 1977 by jumping to their neck height and strangling them with a spider's web. It was never caught by police, despite the most sophisticated magnifying glasses being used, and it never struck again after apparently suffering ligament damage when attempting to kill a Mr Perambulate of Yoker. It was so famous in fact, that a poem was written at the time by Gordon McQueen, the former Manchester United and Scotland star. It is entitled simply "The wee flea they couldnae see". The garotting flea Killed almost three Until the queen's jubilee Saw it injure it's knee Poetic, to say the most. Finally, there was Velocity Girl's rather strange dream. Quite apart from the fact that anyone who dreams of me should probably visit a hospital (oh, you have been?), I found it rather amusing, and altogether charming. Not unlike the woman herself. And on that note, I shall take my leave for today. The hills look really good at the moment, what a beautiful night. Goodbye. Alasdair xx +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. 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